P.S.

Here's a little piece of how I started my morning yesterday: put this song on, started some coffee, grabbed some cereal, and sat down with my Bible and journal as the rain came down.

Mmmmmmmm.........

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRqI5R6L7ow

(Thanks for giving this to me, Josh Williams. :)

Congratulations. You have found the pebble, and missed the gravel pit.

So says...guess who? Abernathy, you old foxhound. I actually, and genuinely, really like this guy. When I'm in his class, I feel like my mind is always active and my face is always grinning- that's a recipe for success, readers. It's what brings me all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed to McDonough Hall on Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday mornings. He doesn't work too hard to hide the fact that under that bristly, sharp-tongued, often-playful exterior of his is some genuine care for us and what he does. A good teacher, that one.


A thought: have you ever been in close proximity to many people on treadmills and felt deeply in your soul that in some cases, the treadmill is working way harder than the treadmiller? A telling sign is the sounds they make...you know the one: the footsteps sound kinda like the treadmill is getting repeatedly and systematically punched in the gut, in between high-pitched groaning cries.

I think I may need to write a strongly worded letter or two.

Hey, you guys want to pray for something specific? I know I've covered this with a few of you, but it bears repeating. I don't know if you've gathered this, but law school is kind of...busy. And...it requires some work. This combination brings the danger of being stuck inside my own world all the time - it's already the human condition to be self-involved, haha, and this environment is just a simmering stew of potential blinders to the world around me. I've been asking God to help me be available: to Him, to have the internal stillness/ears to hear Him, to know His voice in my day, and to have the courage/energy to respond to what He says. Related to that: available to people! I've met some really, really rad people. I want to know them! To be warm, and open, and to figure out how to love people well here. You know? Ask God with me, will ya?


And now, a few pictures. Yesterday was Cindy's 24th! Oh, to have reached nearly a quarter-century of wisdom and experience...It was really great fun. The real celebration adventure (wow, that sounds like a bad theme park) is on Friday, and Cindy doesn't know anything about the night except that she's coming. We're gonna....
....
....
....
Nice try, Cindy. I know you read this. If you really want to know what the plans to your surprise birthday are, you shouldn't agree to me as the planner next time.

Yesterday, yesterday: we made some dinner/dessert at my place, to celebrate La Princesa Preciosa. Just a few friends doin' what friends do best...

Big occasions deserve big glasses. Of note here is the fact that that champagne was a surprise crazy "donation to the party" from the quiet old man who lives next door. I see him all the time, and we always exchange some smiling words...and he always seems surprised that I talk to him, haha. Tonight we had some good wine, but NO OPENER. This was not to be borne, readers. I went outside in my apron, prepared to go to great lengths, when I see Gene on his front porch, watering his crazy plants. "Gene...do you happen to have a wine opener?!"
"Oh, yes. Yes! I have a few. I'll bring you my best one! Do you...do you have enough to drink?"
"Well we do have a bottle of wine that we're pretty excited about..."
"Well I'm a bit of a champagne connoisseur. I'll bring you a good bottle!!"
"Oh....wow! Really?"
"Yes! I insist, I'll bring it right now."
"That's...amazing, thank you!"
He promptly came over with a quite large bottle of very delicious champagne...God bless the cellar that one came from!

Oh I come from a land, from a faraway place...

Haha...I love candid shots.

Bruce and I are cool.

Hebrew getting love...and...Hebrew as a babushka.

Tired, but happy, with bellies full of chicken parmesan, spinach salad, fresh bread, and yellow cake/chocolate icing. Good day. Good night. Good luck.

Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play?

That title is inappropriate and funny, just like the gentleman who - quite intoxicated - grabbed and caressed my earlobe the other night. It elicited the same reaction as the title question did: laughter as I backed away, shaking my head and saying, "Yeah. No."

This time in my life has forced me to ask questions with a new level of depth. Can I do this? Is God really worthy of laying everything else aside? Is He who He says He is? Is the Bible trustworthy? Is His grace really sufficient? I'm not allowed to compartmentalize many things in my life that I have traditionally kept for myself: chiefly, academics. It's not that I'm doing poorly...it's just that never before have I thought...huh. I think I can do this, but I'm not sure. Is that arrogant? Probably. It's always safe to say that I've got a healthy dose of pride mixed into my thought processes, haha. But the Father has been teaching me to respond to this.

Can I do this? Yes, but not because of you. *warm smile*
Are You sure? Oh, Kayla, daughter, the depths I've gone for you to be sure...yes. I see. I know. I'm sure.
What if I fail? Baby girl, what is failure? Remember why you came to do this...I brought you here, and I never waste. I'm good. Don't expect things of your circumstances, you're aiming way too low there. Expect, hope, dream ridiculous things of My character.
What if I'm unsure? That's OK, child. You are mine, and oh, how I approve of you! I never reject you when you choose not to trust Me...I always mold that into a learning process for you- for your joy, for the world's good, and for My glory. Always. Come to Me with your uncertainties. I enjoy hearing even those from you.

Really? I guess it's about not being afraid of weakness, or uncertainty, or anxiety...as a dear friend once relayed to me: It's not about whether or not bad thoughts come. They will, and that's okay. Don't be defeated by their appearance...this is the perfect time for Jesus' strength in my weakness to be real. It's never been about my weakness, or about my weakness in dealing with my weakness, haha. I am fully met by Him. Heart, mind, get on the bandwagon. Move toward some reality...

OK, I'm tired. As promised, here are some pics from my recent artsy adventure. Cindy, Danny and I met up with new friend (I'm totally allowed to call her that, we only hung out just this weekend) Stacey...a lovely fireball with, I suspect, somewhat of a soft center down in there. We met up at this Ethiopian restaurant on U Street...and promptly went into this side door, up the stairs, and into a small upper room - above the restaurant. There was a small stage, and the place was packed with people. As I looked around, I noticed some broad similarities...Asians! Asians and Pacific Islanders! Turns out, I stumbled upon Sulu- an artist collective for the Asian and Pacific Islander American community. There was spoken word, dance, music, and good ol' fashioned activism. Throw in some Ben's Chili Bowl after the show, and you've got yourself a mighty fine evening. I was so delighted...

And I lied. Blogger has decided that it will allow no pictures today...I will try again in future posts? That's lame, I know...but it's Friday, this has been the most labor-intensive week so far, and I just got back from a wonderful potluck at Bruce's sweet Capitol Hill East residence, in the company of some of my favorites. :) Got a hot Skype date with my beloved Sarah in the morning, but for now it's time to indulge and catch up on House!



(I love you, Hugh Laurie. Keep this a secret between us for now.)

Yep.

Because I know you want it - Dinh quote of the day, beginning our discussion of Bush v. Gore: "We can't be talking about that stuff. We have way more important things to talk about, like who should be Preside- I mean, what the Constitution says about elections."

Sometimes I read parts of health books/recommendation guides and I wonder if the people who write them are thinking to themselves, "Huh. I wonder what I can make people do." For those of you who aspire to write such guides (you mischievous manipulators, you), I have compiled a few helpful keywords/phrases, guaranteed to attract and compel some action from your readers - even when you tell them to do ridiculous things, like sleep in a certain compass alignment or elevate their feet for 15 minutes while lying in the sun.
-improve circulation
-improve (insert organ here) function
-extract nutrients
-balance digestive energy
-naturally draw out toxins
-naturally do, well, anything
-blah blah blah sunshine blah blah blah breathe deeply blah posture blah

You don't even have to give me credit for those. Really, guys, anything I can do to further the body of health literature....I am but a mere servant. But honestly- it's kind of like an earthy Simon Says+Truth or Dare, isn't it?

The next entry will be something of substance, I promise. I'm sorry that all you're getting is the mushy leftovers of my brain. To be fair, it's all anyone is getting right now. The next post will tell you stories about spoken word adventures and ways my heart is responding to Jesus. That'll be neat, won't it?

For now, here are some pictures worth at least 500 words.

Library time. I think I might have been about done with Civil Procedure at this point.

A march I saw, for civil rights...they kept yelling, "What are you afraid of???" I walked with them for awhile, and we became friends.

Sticking my feet in the water at a Friday jazz concert in front of the Archives...*sigh*

Hanging out at Busboys & Poets with Wade and Cindy, after spending our Sunday morning (and afternoon, haha) at Galbraith African Methodist Episcopal Zion Church.

P.S. A tip of the hat to online Georgetown Law Library tutorials, who make me take silly quizzes about the anatomy of statutes but then reward me with enthusiastic clapping sound effects when I get a question right.

I want to go to there

Look at this. Just...look at it. This is Halong Bay, in Vietnam, and ever since my (new? I'm afraid to use this word now, thanks Cindy) friend Bruce told me about his adventures there I can't get it out of my subconscious. To be fair to Bruce and my subconscious, I haven't tried very hard. This is everything I want in an early morning kayak...it's almost "deeper, more wonderful, more like places in a story: a story you have never heard but very much want to know," to quote Mr. Lewis.

Not a morning person? Don't like my abstract words? OK, you Philistine. How about this picture?

That's got to do at least something in your barren soul.

Alright, back to a CivPro study session with a study buddy in the cafe below the gym...punctuated by the friendly neighborhood sounds of earthquakes and bombs being dropped.

Oh, no, pardon, that's just people ignoring the "Don't Drop the Weights" sign on the floor above us - my mistake.

Love. :)

Here's that song...

...because you never would have found it on your own, would you. Let's be real.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uuD9pgIZVMM

Today, in "Fun Law School Tidbits to Share with your Friends..."

This is a Constitutional Law flavored edition. This may or may not be correlated to the fact that I had that class today.

The venerable Professor Viet Dinh is the brilliant, alarming, always entertaining ConLaw instructor to whom I keep teasingly referring. I really have learned a fantastic number of things from this man in the four class sessions I have sat under him. The Constitution comes alive...I'm thinking of producing a "Constitution on Ice," with dancing articles and clauses, with the Framers weaving their deft way through the past and future. There will, of course, be a black-robed King of England with a deep, sinuous voice and a supporting Articles of Confederation character (Constitution's wimpy kid brother) who whines often, and gets beaten down often-er. Jump on this bandwagon, guys, I'm telling you.

Wow. Do I ever digress. All of that tomfoolery aside, I really have learned so much already. He deals more in the abstract than Abernathy's insistent Civil Procedure, so it's quite a different experience to follow him and respond to his teaching questions. And...I know I have mentioned words like "alarming," and "crazy," and "abrupt" in connection with his persona. How shall I describe this to you? Perhaps it would be best to give you a few verbatim snapshots from today's class.

Dinh's brand of mercy is a strange one to behold. Often, he loves to give people time to answer the questions he has asked them by madly rabbit-trailing with little to no warning. Example:
Dinh: "What is Ms. Kelly's injury in this case?"
Kid who doesn't know the answer: "Uhm, well...uhm, do you want it...from...the...text...?"
Dinh, hopping up onto his desk with his legs swinging: "I LOOOVVVVE CROCODILES! What's the difference between an alligator and a crocodile? WHAT IS IT???"

Later on:
Dinh: "Does she have standing, as an environmentalist?"
Kid: "Yes?"
Dinh: "NO!"
Kid: "Well...I-"
Dinh: "Does Al Gore have standing?"
Kid: "Uh-"
Dinh: "SOMEONE gave me the BEST BUMPER STICKER RECENTLY!! I have a huge car, with a huge engine, and the bumper sticker says, 'Al Gore hates me.' AND HE DOES!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Know what the common factor is here? I was laughing. The whole time.

As a relatively unrelated side note, I know I'm amongst some substantial vocabularies when I'm taking notes on what's being said and Word does not recognize a significant percentage of what I'm typing.

Right now I am sitting in the (pretty fairly decked out) Gewirz dorm-apartment of my new friend, Cindy ("I do not qualify as a new friend anymore, Kayla. Sorry."). She is making me a grilled peanut butter and honey sandwich ("It's good! I promise!") and giving me milk and a napkin as I write this, but she's been a delight for so, so many more reasons. She's an international human rights kindred spirit ("That's what brought us together!") and a lover of Jesus and people ("Uh...redundant."). A NorCal girl, she studied Political Science in undergrad, is fluent in Spanish, danced competitive ballroom in college, isn't bad on the Latin dance floor either, has warm eyes, a quick laugh, excellent massage hands, a lovely soprano voice, and beautiful caramel skin from her half-Guatemalan ethnicity, and enjoys kittens, sunsets, and long walks on the beach (really, probably).

Strange picture of Cindy, proving a point over a falafel sandwich.

Well? Sold? What better way to end a strangely-progressing post than some other random thing: a song I've been loving, thanks to the one and only Libby Conine:

Go check out "Audience" by Cold War Kids. Do it.

Picture! From an evening stroll on the Mall.

Who knew the Constitution was complicated? Honestly...

Well, my Constitutional Law professor is still crazy. And brilliant. And startling. And...almost giggly, at times? I'm still meeting all sorts of people I really like (yay! That's my favorite part). And...I'm still exhausted. Haven't worked out this whole life balance yet.

In terms of Civil Procedure, I was cold-called this morning by Señor FearClimate. In lesser, non-law-school people terms, that means "put on the hot seat." He stuck with me, probing my poor tired mind for answers for the entire length of the class. That's rare, in case you were wondering. Usually his brand of Socratic method is so focused that he allows a few people over the course of the class to shoulder the burden...but today was a new day, apparently. A brand new day. Don't cry for me though, guys- I didn't suck. :) I knew the stuff, I connected his inferences, and I won't lie to you- it felt good. Best part? In response to one of his questions about a counterclaim for adultery, he set me up beautifully...

Prof: So what happens then?
Me: The husband defendant files a counterclaim against his wife, seeking absolute divorce.
Prof: Yes, yes, he's saying...well we could use many words here, couldn't we Kayla, but he's saying that...
Me: Ho.
Abernathy turned around to look at me, the class erupted, and HE LAUGHED. I felt like I won Olympic freaking gold.

This brings me to something that I've been loving about this environment. As I was telling my extraordinary sister Mel today, the high pressure is here, but not necessarily the cutthroat competition. That's so, so valuable! When one of us does well in Abernathy's class, we all feel like we've accomplished something. I suppose we have, haha. Whatever common-bond, trial-by-fire community psychology is behind it, I'm a big fan. Thanks, Section 4, for continually calling me a rock star all throughout campus today. My heart is warm and my grin is big, and I keep finding myself grateful for all of you.

One more thing I want to say tonight, quickly, that I thought was interesting in terms of global policy. To quote Professor Viet Dinh (my Vietnamese ConLaw professor who many consider to be one of the next conservative nominations to the Supreme Court) during one of our conversations about John Marshall: "Neo-textualists such as myself got a little rap on the knuckles recently when one critic said, 'You arrogant Americans! You think you can enter into another country, with all of its history and cultural implications, and build a government based on your model? Have you forgotten how you began? You had Washington - arguably the greatest general in modern times, Marshall - the greatest institution-building mind, and Madison - the greatest constitutional thinker. So...what do you have?'"

I leave you with your thoughts. :) And the knowledge that we've caught four mice since I last posted.

I've been thinking for too long about what this title should be.

Welp...It's probably time for me to give a little more to this blog than someone else's words, incomparable though C.S. Lewis is. Don't you worry- you'll be seeing a lot of him, no doubt.

Week 2 of law school! Alert the media. Before I give you any posts (and some already amusing stories) about my maiden voyage as a law student, I will spend a post or two telling you about some non-academic parts of my life here. Yeah...before we get to the insane, brilliant, Asian Constitutional law professor who was the chief architect of the Patriot Act or the merciless Civil Procedure professor who is legendary at Georgetown for his climate of fear. All in due time. You know, I'm all about managing your expectations (thanks, McCombs School of Business!!!!). I will tell you, though- I like it. :) I think I belong here.

So, I'm a big fan of my D.C. abode. It's the lower unit of a good ol' New England townhouse, and it's English basement style- so half of it is below ground, but thankfully not the window half. It feels just like living like the privileged folk do, sunshine and all. What luxury! I do really like it. And! Just six or seven blocks from the Law Center. Que magnifique. The roomies are the most important part of that package, of course, but I like them enough to give them their own paragraph in another post.

One surprise element of our living situation here that wasn't in the contract just became apparent this weekend: mice. BONUS! It's like living in a Disney movie. I'm thinking of naming them and sewing them little mice-shirts. Either that, or calling the exterminator immediately and asserting my species dominance. I'll sleep on it.

Well, as I'm sure will be a pattern with many of these posts, I have been studying all day and I'm exhausted. I will sign off with three things the Father impressed on my heart last week, during a moment of uncertainty. I had just emerged from the aforementioned climate of fear with Professor Stonewall NoMercy, and I had been struck by the magnitude of the world of law, and minds, and dysfunction, and scholarship, and expectations, and...my head was spinning a bit as I was thinking about what it takes to walk toward worthy things in a conflicted world, all meshed into a contained world of concentrated academia. I felt small. I went into one of the courtyards, sat on a bench, and talked to Jesus for awhile. When I got up, I had three mantras being tattooed on my brain:

1. Learn to be fearless.  Of men. Of the world. Of yourself.

2. Learn to learn. Learn to learn in public, and expose your learning process. What an opportunity this is, to do something you've never been particularly comfortable with! The Father will not allow lions to eat His children.

3. The harder it is, the better I'll be. The better advocate, the better mind, the fuller understanding of grace, the more courageous child of God.


Simple...but solid to hold in these two hands of mine. Until next time......

Smells like a new horizon

Well, you’ve told me I should do it! Now you’re getting what you’ve asked for, let’s see if you like it. The musings of a little girl who went to a little law school called Georgetown in a little city called DC…

The form on Blogger tells me to describe my newly born blog. No subtlety at all in its request, either. How embarrassing for Blogger.

Well, Blogger, DC can be cold, and the word "epoch" represents a motley crew of things that warm my heart. It's a favorite coffee shop in Austin...it's the title of a soul-grabbing DeYarmond Edison song...it's a literary magazine at Cornell...it's...a part of a strange cosmological theory about evolution. ..

Oh, and it also has an appropriate definition for this chapter of the Life and Times of Kayla.

Well, I feel good about that introduction. Don’t you? It’s time for me to head off to sleep in lieu of more descriptive ramblings about what’s actually happening in my life. And so I leave you, dear reader, with one of my favorite quotes of all time.

“There have been times when I think we do not desire heaven but more often if I find myself wondering whether, in our heart of hearts, we ever desired anything else.  You may have noticed to books you really love are bound together by a secret thread.  You know very well what is the common quality that makes you love them, though you cannot put into words: but most of your friends do not see it at all, and often wonder why, liking this, you should also like that.  Again, you stood before some landscape, which seems to embody what you have been looking for all your life; and then turned to the friend at your side who appears to be seeing what you saw — but at the first words of gulf yawns between you, and you realize that this landscape means something totally different to him, that he is pursuing an alien vision and cares nothing for the ineffable suggestion by which you are transported.  Even in your hobbies, has there not always been some secret attraction which the others are curiously ignorant of — something, not to be identified with, but always on the verge of breaking through, the smell of cut wood in the workshop with a clap-clap of water against the boat’s side?  Are not all lifelong friendships born at the moment when at last you meet another human being who has some inkling (but faint and uncertain even in the best) of that something which you were born desiring, and which, beneath the flux of other desires and it all the momentary silences between the louder passions, night and day, year by year, from childhood to old age, you are looking for, watching for, listening for?  You have never had it.  All the things that have ever deeply possessed your soul have been but hints of it — tantalizing glimpses, promises never quite fulfilled, echoes that died away just as they caught your ear.  But if it should really become manifest — if there ever came an echo that did not die away but swelled into the sound itself — you would know it.  Beyond all possibility of doubt you would say “Here at last is the thing I was made for.”  We cannot tell each other about it.  It is the secret signature of each soul, the incommunicable and unappeasable want, the thing we desired before we met our wives or made our friends or chose our work, and which we shall still desire on our deathbeds, when the mind no longer knows wife or friend or work.  While we are, this is.  If we lose this, we lose all.”

-Clive Staples Lewis